One Teen Wonders

I dont know if its weird talking about personal things on my sort of blog but im going to do it now. SORT OF. I want to talk about the wonders and heartache of teenage life. Me being 17 I think im in the prime place to judge what teen life feels like. So far it hasn't been the best ride ever or the most magnificant. I've been through alot, alot more then most of my friends have. Some don't even know what ive been through because I don't like to talk about how I feel, what think about my life and where I am right now. Sometimes its just too difficult to explain a big black hole. For the lucky ones, some my age have had the time of there lives with young love, friends and experiencing things others would only dream of. What about those who don't? The ones that get stuck half way and stay completely lost, for what seems like eternity?

When it comes to confidence there is two sides of a personality. The "confident" side and the real side. Anyone who has been in depression would know what this is like. Everyday you wake up, put on a brave face for your friends and wonder if maybe this day will be better then the last. And yeah, you have those days that seem great at the time but then the next is just the same as the day before that. You come to a sad realisation...is this MY life? Day after day will I be like this? Will I never experience something new and exciting? Or even thrilling? Life changing?

The problem with the world of teenagers is...highschool. The world is different and everything you do is judged by the people around you, so called friends comment on what you should and shouldn't do. Teachers can make or break you. Love is a posession not a feeling. This fake temporary world full of bimbos, jocks and freaks. Can it really be this horrible? A world so harsh you dont know who you are until you leave?...Yes.

Unfortunatly to survive a world like this you are labelled and have a certain type of personality you must follow. Even if you think you have a clean slate there is always someone who is jealous, angry or frustrated with you to start something, a rumour can ruin you. All your friends gone, enemies become those friends and you get involved with people you thought didnt exist. From the first step in those doors, your first lesson, you are being judged. Is it easier to ignor or get involved? Fight back the enemy and win the glory? Which eventually leaves you none the richer...or happier.

Its a never ending battle. Girls will be girls and boy will be boys. We can learn off each other, grow with each other but never leave our thoughts. Some friends stay friends, others just fade. Dreams become our future and stories our past. Its just getting through it that really hurts the most. Scars are deep...

...but memories are deeper.